Comments on: Manifestations That You’re In A Toxic Relationship You Didn’t Know – Until Now http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/ Thu, 16 Feb 2012 11:18:58 +0000 hourly 1 By: Sadeyes http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/comment-page-1/#comment-710 Sadeyes Tue, 17 Jan 2012 12:12:27 +0000 http://getexbackmagic.com/?p=620#comment-710 Help it seems like I'm losing myself as this woman defines me as she see me, have not been right since, it started off cool so i thought but it was right there art the start. Silly oh me just wanted to be loved, stressing really bad now it seem like we just pick at faults now and so on. HEEEEEEElp!!!!!! Don't want to be just tolerated. Help it seems like I’m losing myself as this woman defines me as she see me, have not been right since, it started off cool so i thought but it was right there art the start. Silly oh me just wanted to be loved, stressing really bad now it seem like we just pick at faults now and so on. HEEEEEEElp!!!!!! Don’t want to be just tolerated.

]]> By: GetExBack http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/comment-page-1/#comment-621 GetExBack Tue, 04 Oct 2011 16:15:08 +0000 http://getexbackmagic.com/?p=620#comment-621 Hi Andrea, Here's my reply to you http://getexbackmagic.com/interracial-relationships-misunderstanding-or-plain-old-abuse/. Your friend, Curtis Hi Andrea,

Here’s my reply to you http://getexbackmagic.com/interracial-relationships-misunderstanding-or-plain-old-abuse/.

Your friend,

Curtis

]]> By: Andrea Gillespie http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/comment-page-1/#comment-615 Andrea Gillespie Sat, 20 Aug 2011 11:30:22 +0000 http://getexbackmagic.com/?p=620#comment-615 After reading this I have realised just how toxic my marriage is.I have struggled with this relationship from early days before we were married and have excused a lot of bad behaviour as cultural differences.I am in an inter-racial relationship.However,I don't really think it really has much to do with different cultural expectations but the kind of people we are.In that I do take some responibility for attaching myself so much to someone who is clearly not good for me and being too needy in needing to be loved that its just created dependency.He has always been subject to temper tantrums,often over the most trivial things and sometimes has a public display of anger,including shouting and whacking me on the arm and generally quite shocking random behaviour.I now tread egg shells and never know when the next bout of temper will arise.I actually feel anxious and afraid and find myself trying to keep things on an even keel to avoid another explosion.He appears to be very polite and mild mannered in front of my friends and family,but not with me.He ignores me most of the time and there is little conversation and less laughter.He doesnt like me bringing friends to the house so I go out when I need space to breathe.He has become v dependant on me to do everything for him since he was new to this country and I find little time for myself or if I get time im too tired.We don't do anything together apart from work and occasional holiday where again there is no conversation and a brooding feeling that the ice may crack at a moment and some scene will unfold.In the past he had an affair and I nearly left him then but couldnt as he begged me to stay.Now he has his own business here and i am financially dependent on him.I realise patterns of behaviour arise from childhood and we were both subjects of violent childhoods.Now I just feel strangely sad and flat.The other night,I had an incredible urge to hurt myself somehow I have no idea why and this is not usual for me.It was a bit frightening.My self-esteem is at an all time low and at 40 I feel that part of my life is over.Certainly the thoughts of having children(although a bit late)with someone like this feels like one route to a huge trap.I sometimes wonder if he is a bit mentally ill as he treats me in a maternal way at times,i.e its my responsibility to make sure his life goes according to plan even at my own detriment,and he speaks in an infantile voice in order to get affection of me.Im tired of moaning at my friends about it all and im sure its a real drag for them.I dont know where to go from here but he now wants us to sell my property and move together into a bigger house.I just cant see a way out.Its black in here. After reading this I have realised just how toxic my marriage is.I have struggled with this relationship from early days before we were married and have excused a lot of bad behaviour as cultural differences.I am in an inter-racial relationship.However,I don’t really think it really has much to do with different cultural expectations but the kind of people we are.In that I do take some responibility for attaching myself so much to someone who is clearly not good for me and being too needy in needing to be loved that its just created dependency.He has always been subject to temper tantrums,often over the most trivial things and sometimes has a public display of anger,including shouting and whacking me on the arm and generally quite shocking random behaviour.I now tread egg shells and never know when the next bout of temper will arise.I actually feel anxious and afraid and find myself trying to keep things on an even keel to avoid another explosion.He appears to be very polite and mild mannered in front of my friends and family,but not with me.He ignores me most of the time and there is little conversation and less laughter.He doesnt like me bringing friends to the house so I go out when I need space to breathe.He has become v dependant on me to do everything for him since he was new to this country and I find little time for myself or if I get time im too tired.We don’t do anything together apart from work and occasional holiday where again there is no conversation and a brooding feeling that the ice may crack at a moment and some scene will unfold.In the past he had an affair and I nearly left him then but couldnt as he begged me to stay.Now he has his own business here and i am financially dependent on him.I realise patterns of behaviour arise from childhood and we were both subjects of violent childhoods.Now I just feel strangely sad and flat.The other night,I had an incredible urge to hurt myself somehow I have no idea why and this is not usual for me.It was a bit frightening.My self-esteem is at an all time low and at 40 I feel that part of my life is over.Certainly the thoughts of having children(although a bit late)with someone like this feels like one route to a huge trap.I sometimes wonder if he is a bit mentally ill as he treats me in a maternal way at times,i.e its my responsibility to make sure his life goes according to plan even at my own detriment,and he speaks in an infantile voice in order to get affection of me.Im tired of moaning at my friends about it all and im sure its a real drag for them.I dont know where to go from here but he now wants us to sell my property and move together into a bigger house.I just cant see a way out.Its black in here.

]]> By: Rose http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/comment-page-1/#comment-608 Rose Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:54:18 +0000 http://getexbackmagic.com/?p=620#comment-608 It may seem like your life as you know it is over but the good news is that when time and space allow you to heal over your lose, you have much more to gain. Like true love. That comes from within. Love yourself and slowly but certainly surely that frown and tears and sorrow will become a smile and peace and joy. I just got out of a toxic relationship... The second one in my life time and tried for so long to get him to love me. Wow... I am still in shock when I think back on all I sacrificed to please him.. Never thinking about my feelings and what was important to me. Now I am grateful for the awakening I have experienced while breaking away from him. I am back to that peaceful person I was born as. And am carrying a smile, peace , joy and LOVE everywhere I go . It gets better...hang in there. Peace and love...from a rose that cares :-) It may seem like your life as you know it is over but the good news is that when time and space allow you to heal over your lose, you have much more to gain. Like true love. That comes from within. Love yourself and slowly but certainly surely that frown and tears and sorrow will become a smile and peace and joy. I just got out of a toxic relationship… The second one in my life time and tried for so long to get him to love me. Wow… I am still in shock when I think back on all I sacrificed to please him.. Never thinking about my feelings and what was important to me. Now I am grateful for the awakening I have experienced while breaking away from him. I am back to that peaceful person I was born as. And am carrying a smile, peace , joy and LOVE everywhere I go . It gets better…hang in there. Peace and love…from a rose that cares :-)

]]> By: Laura http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/comment-page-1/#comment-605 Laura Sat, 14 May 2011 02:22:28 +0000 http://getexbackmagic.com/?p=620#comment-605 My husband is constantly putting me down. He gets mad and picks up things and acts like he is going to throw them at me. 3/4 pf the time he does...i used to just get upset and cry or argue...now I just get violent....I'm not even close to being his strength level and in the end I get the brunt of everything. It's about every 2 weeks and then it's like we wake up and it's a new day....I can't live like this anymore.....He spit in my face because i was laughing athimbecause he was acting crazy trying to find something.....does this cycle ever break? Can people change,,,,we quit drinking, are in counseling individually and have a minister come once weekly for guidance and GODS want for a christian marriage.....I really don't want to leave but I have to....I've signed a lease....me and the four kids ar leaving.....just wish it didn't have to be this way..he has so much potential and I see the good..it's just so far buried downing his anger that it's not much to want to find anymore, any advice...divorce is the last thing I want but it just keeps getting worse My husband is constantly putting me down. He gets mad and picks up things and acts like he is going to throw them at me. 3/4 pf the time he does…i used to just get upset and cry or argue…now I just get violent….I’m not even close to being his strength level and in the end I get the brunt of everything. It’s about every 2 weeks and then it’s like we wake up and it’s a new day….I can’t live like this anymore…..He spit in my face because i was laughing athimbecause he was acting crazy trying to find something…..does this cycle ever break? Can people change,,,,we quit drinking, are in counseling individually and have a minister come once weekly for guidance and GODS want for a christian marriage…..I really don’t want to leave but I have to….I’ve signed a lease….me and the four kids ar leaving…..just wish it didn’t have to be this way..he has so much potential and I see the good..it’s just so far buried downing his anger that it’s not much to want to find anymore, any advice…divorce is the last thing I want but it just keeps getting worse

]]> By: tricia http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/comment-page-1/#comment-587 tricia Mon, 25 Oct 2010 02:45:09 +0000 http://getexbackmagic.com/?p=620#comment-587 I have a child from my previous marriage. When I first met my bf, he was a little concern being a father figure to my child. But we continued to date but then I kept trying to break up with him because I think he was fooling around because my gut keep feeling that way. He always denied it until one day last year I caught him chatting on multiple online dating sites. He apologized for that and said want to try to work things out with me. I tried to forgive him but it was too hard. I gave him my love and trust but then I couldn't gain it back. I fought with him continuously after that and found my gut is always true to me. Another thing we fought about was that he never introduced me to his family and friends. I know he is not married because his family lived only 20 mins from me. After 2 1/2 years, he wasn't introducing me, we broke off. I couldn't handle it anymore so can he. I said meant things to him like he was not a man to stand by his words, broke his promises, etc... I never cursed at him but everything was very direct based on my pain what he should have done as a man. He said very hurtful things back to me. We always got back and we would apology to each other. I felt our relationship was unhealthy and not right. I told him so and I want to improve on that. We both are mature, educated adults and also good looking. He knows that but he could never seem to able to introduce me to his family. I think it is very disrespectful that he has toward me. We broke up after a long talk because I couldn't talk it anymore after 2 1/2 years. By the way, he is 2 years young than me and never been married. I think he was just hold on to me until find someone else to replace me. He knows that I am loyal and have many people ready to date me. I think he was afraid to lose me but also not ready to be committed to me. I don't like guy who has one foot in and one foot out. I told him to go leave and he left. We broke up just like that. Now, it has been a week. I did not talk to him. He said me a email to apology that he is not a good man to me but I didn't response back. I still love this person. Not sure why. I keep asking myself that. He always hide our relationship and at to this point, I am no longer happy to be with him. If I think that I will see him again, my blood would boil up. I want to move on but it is so painful. I truly love this man so much but what he did to me, I don't deserve any of it and he knows that. He apology for what he did but I could no longer want to talk to him. Can I ever able to move on after this painful love? I was not build to just walk out and forget everything. I tried to put my life purpose back together but I feel so lost. Please help I have a child from my previous marriage. When I first met my bf, he was a little concern being a father figure to my child. But we continued to date but then I kept trying to break up with him because I think he was fooling around because my gut keep feeling that way. He always denied it until one day last year I caught him chatting on multiple online dating sites. He apologized for that and said want to try to work things out with me. I tried to forgive him but it was too hard. I gave him my love and trust but then I couldn’t gain it back. I fought with him continuously after that and found my gut is always true to me. Another thing we fought about was that he never introduced me to his family and friends. I know he is not married because his family lived only 20 mins from me. After 2 1/2 years, he wasn’t introducing me, we broke off. I couldn’t handle it anymore so can he. I said meant things to him like he was not a man to stand by his words, broke his promises, etc… I never cursed at him but everything was very direct based on my pain what he should have done as a man. He said very hurtful things back to me. We always got back and we would apology to each other. I felt our relationship was unhealthy and not right. I told him so and I want to improve on that. We both are mature, educated adults and also good looking. He knows that but he could never seem to able to introduce me to his family. I think it is very disrespectful that he has toward me. We broke up after a long talk because I couldn’t talk it anymore after 2 1/2 years. By the way, he is 2 years young than me and never been married. I think he was just hold on to me until find someone else to replace me. He knows that I am loyal and have many people ready to date me. I think he was afraid to lose me but also not ready to be committed to me. I don’t like guy who has one foot in and one foot out. I told him to go leave and he left. We broke up just like that.

Now, it has been a week. I did not talk to him. He said me a email to apology that he is not a good man to me but I didn’t response back. I still love this person. Not sure why. I keep asking myself that. He always hide our relationship and at to this point, I am no longer happy to be with him. If I think that I will see him again, my blood would boil up. I want to move on but it is so painful. I truly love this man so much but what he did to me, I don’t deserve any of it and he knows that. He apology for what he did but I could no longer want to talk to him. Can I ever able to move on after this painful love? I was not build to just walk out and forget everything. I tried to put my life purpose back together but I feel so lost. Please help

]]> By: Candice http://getexbackmagic.com/manifestations-that-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship-you-didnt-know-until-now/comment-page-1/#comment-526 Candice Tue, 26 Jan 2010 12:24:57 +0000 http://getexbackmagic.com/?p=620#comment-526 Hi Brett, It's possible to set responsibility to any situation even if you feel it's partly someone else's fault but at the end of the day you can only take so much responsibility yourself. Also, being guilty or acting guilty, by taking responsibility can be seen as weakness and this can be highly unattractive. Maybe it will be worthwhile to address, what sounds like, why your partner may have this confidence issues and evaluating if this is something under your control or could never be under your control. Hi Brett,

It’s possible to set responsibility to any situation even if you feel it’s partly someone else’s fault but at the end of the day
you can only take so much responsibility yourself. Also, being guilty or acting guilty, by taking responsibility can be seen as weakness and this can be highly unattractive.

Maybe it will be worthwhile to address, what sounds like, why your partner may have this confidence issues and evaluating if this is something under your control or could never be under your control.

]]>