If You Know That It’s The Right Thing To Do – Get Him Back

November 7, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Dear Candice,

I want my ex back but I’m not sure if it’s the right thing to do. I feel that there’s a lot more to this situation. Can I still push on getting him back even in doubt? Please help. Need your thoughts to enlighten me. Thanks Candice. – Carrie (Oakland, CA)

Dear Carrie,

We often times see couples who are stuck in weird relationships that are clearly destructive. Those couples who obviously have a relationship that’s doomed and hopeless, guaranteed to leave them both unhappy after wasting so much time and energy. These are the couples who should split up, as we would all say.

On the other hand, there are other couples who should stay together even though they experience rough times. The couples who know in their hearts that the two of them fit together nicely and realize that something special is always there. Those are the couples who have radically good relationships and you can sense the spark between them. They love one another. Still, something happens and they break up.

So let me ask you this Carrie, which group do you belong? If you’re in the first group, I hope you get out of that mess as soon as you possibly can! If, however, you’re in the second group, getting him back is my advice. You don’t have to acquiesce with this break up. You don’t need to say “that’s the way the cookie crumbles” and move on. If you know that it’s the right thing to do. That’s right. Get him back.

Now Carrie, let me ask you more questions. Can you imagine living without your ex boyfriend? Do you think that the two of you do not belong together? Is your heart telling you that the relationship is better off that way? Do you not feel the love? Look into your heart for a moment. If “No” is your answer to all of the questions, then it’s time to get him back.

Believe it or not, break ups are optional. You can get over it. Many women, including myself, have been in situations like yours. Instead of deciding to just accept an unwanted break up, we decided to take a stand for our love. We decided to get back together with our exes. Thousands and thousands of couples have emerged from break ups to build wonderfully strong and fulfilling relationships.

Let’s entertain the alternative for a moment. What might happen if you decide to surrender in the face of this challenge. You won’t see him again. You won’t spend another evening together, share another story, swap another kiss or enjoy another hug. Obviously, this isn’t what you want. You don’t want to give up on love and you don’t want to turn a deaf ear to your heart’s lament. If you make this decision, it will haunt you.

Don’t ever think to surrender. If you try to get your man back and fail, you can at least take solace in the fact that you tried. If you’ve made efforts to get back together and it doesn’t work out, at least you’ll know you gave it a chance to flourish.

If you are certain that you want to preserve the relationship, get him back. Listen to your heart, instead of just accepting the break up if you really don’t want to. If you know deep down inside that taking a second chance on your relationship is the right thing to do… no one’s stopping you to get your ex boyfriend back.

Share This Post

Posted by Candice | Filed Under Advice, Breakup, Relationship 

Don’t Let A Break Up Break Your Heart -Think Straight And Get Your Ex Back

November 6, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Dear Candice,

I broke up with my boyfriend about three weeks ago. He was begging me to come back to him right after the breakup but I refused to. Now it’s been three days and I haven’t heard from him. I tried to call him to say that I already realized that I want him back too. But he’s not answering my calls. I also went to his house but I wasn’t able to find him there. I want him back but it seems hopeless now. I never thought that wanting to get him back is this tough. I often think that probably the break up was meant and if he still loves me he will find me. But I don’t like this feeling, I want him back. What else can I do? – Wishful Thinker, 18 (Palm Bay, Florida)

Dear Wishful Thinker,

Yes, it’s true that if you want your ex back, things are tough. But whatever you do, don’t let this break up break your heart. No, this isn’t another attempt to lift your spirits by telling you that you’ll get over it or that there are many fish in the sea. Because I’m sure you’ve heard already too much of that. What I’m telling you is a different positive message. I’m here to tell you that you can actually get your boyfriend back if that’s what you want to do.

You can get him back, no matter how hopeless you think your case is, if you have a good approach you can certainly get your ex boyfriend back in no time. In fact, break ups are completely optional.You can rebuild your relationshipif you know in your heart that the two of you deserve a second chance at true love.

Many long-lasting partnerships navigated the choppy waters of a break up somewhere along the line, this happens everyday. In fact, there are a lot of people who break up and get back together. And you can be part of that group. I know, from my own experience and through observation and empirical evidence, that almost every strong and stable relationship experienced rough times at some point. And you are just like us, there’s no reason at all why you can’t you have your relationship back, too. Your breakup is just another story and you can have a happy ending, if you really want to. Getting your man back into your life is definitely the end result of your concentrated effort. However, there’s some real effort that has to occur between now and then.

It’s alright to believe that love will find it’s own way, but you must be aware of the fact that it requires a helpful hand. It needs a map to find you. In fact, you may need to go find it within yourself to take action to have a rebound relationship. I’ve been through your situation, I wasted so much time waiting, thinking and hoping that our love will find it’s way. You won’t get your man back with wishful thinking.

Again, that’s only part of the story. If you really want your ex boyfriend back, you need to take action. However, you need more than action, what you need is the right action. If you just take a blind stab at getting him back based on your hunch, you probably aren’t going to succeed. You need a solid plan based on ethical core principles that can help you get through every step as you travel from breaking up to making up.

Don’t wait and let the emotional bruising fade away. And instead of putting it all behind you, just because “that’s what people usually do”, you can be part of the exceptions to the rule who decide to take a stand for your love and to find a way to get your ex boyfriend back. Think straight to find a smart approach and combine it with an absolute will to take action, through that you can get your boyfriend back.

You don’t need to go out looking for some other fish in the sea. If you do want your ex back, make it happen. Once again, break ups are optional. And you can shift from your current hardship to a long-lasting relationship with your boyfriend, if you approach the problem with the right mindset and information. Always remember, in order to get your man back, you need to be equipped with two things – a willingness to take act and a good approach.

Share This Post

Posted by Candice | Filed Under Advice, Breakup, Relationship 

« Previous Page